Thursday, April 23, 2009

Advice for Parents

What I am about to say may not make you happy, but that's not what matters. What matters most is the question 'is it true?' and then what must be asked is "will I receive or reject what God has to say?"
The Lordship of Christ has greater implications and a wider reach then what concerns only you. His rule, His call to submission regards every area of our lives: and this includes parenting. Frankly there is too much advice being given on what concerns raising children. Above all the reasonable advice that we may be exposed to, especially above all the experiential advice that we have heard, we must FIRST come to a firm grasp of what the scriptures demand.
Given that our children are blessings from God, it is clear that we have been entrusted with a stewardship; these children of ours are FIRST His children and contrary to popular thought, God has not given us as much freedom as is thought.
Our parenting is just another test as to how much we been conformed to this world, whether our thinking is shaped by the scriptures or by the world. What you've always done, what you were taught, what you feel comfortable with, and/or what Dr. Dobson has to say is quite insignificant.
Allow then to just point out a few things we must realize:
1. That our children are depraved!
Much of the cute and funny things they do, would be better called SIN! (I'm sorry, do you think I'm exaggerating? Then your problem is with the scriptures not me.) They love to sin, have a natural lean towards sin and need to be desperately saved.
2. Rebellion is bound up in them
Children are born REBELS, they love to rebel and the scriptures make PLAIN that their rebellion must be overcome, it must be 'driven out'! (Did a couple red flags rise? Why? wisdom? NO, once again you are allowing a perverted experience to shape your willingness to OBEY God!)
Most IMPORTANTLY!! 3. We are talking about YOUR child, not everyone elses!
Funny isn't it when people talk about their child being around the 'bad' kids, where are the people who actually have these 'bad' children?

With that said, let us just look quickly at one scripture.

Prov 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.
In other words it could read like this: Give your children what they absolutely don't want, and don't give them what they absolutely demand or else you WILL regret it.
It would seem that the advice of the times is to give your children responsibility, freedom and privacy. Such advice, such wisdom is in direct opposition to the counsel of God. There are many accounts of wicked children in the old testament who were given exactly what the world is suggesting today. Eli was rebuked by God for his lack of control over his children. Lot had to watch his children endure the wrath of God because he took the advice of today. David had to suffer a revolt within his family and much judgment because he followed the advice of today. What all these examples and many more had in common is this, their children brought shame to them.
In many within the church as with the world, children are training their parents, and as i think i have said before, they are seeking peace at the expense of truth. To persist in this is evidence that your love for your children and your belief in the scriptures is weak!
Every child lusts for freedom, lusts for more responsibility (meaning trust with things), and lusts for privacy. This goes equal for girls as well as boys, rejecting popular thought on the difference in sexes, the fact is both the female and male sex is totally depraved, sin-loving and hell deserving as the other; the little difference that exists, is owing to how that depravity is manifested.
Freedom and responsibility is something that must be earned and that with much limits. Parents have a responsibility to know their children and to protect their children. This includes their influences, what they are exposed to and who they are exposed to. This is NOT however something that calls for a decreasing enforcement with age, but quite the contrary an increased enforcement with age. The teen stage has NO biblical warrant whatsoever, this supposed teen stage is not something NEW but something OLD that is manifesting with intensity. It is at this time that parents should be paying close attention to those 'professions' of belief in Christ, and when all the evidence suggests they are NOT led by nor seek the Lord, beware of seeking comfort in this belief of a teen stage. If teens need to learn anything these days, it's that MATURITY has nothing to do with birthdays (age), and that privileges are mercies, not debts owed. Lastly the safeguard to responsibility and freedom, is privacy. Privacy is earned when they LEAVE home (not till then). Privacy is the plague to a healthy family, it's the virus to the defensive ability of the parents. Even within the church this is clear, privacy is NOT something granted leaders; imagine an elder answering to 'private' questions, 'that's none of your business, that's private' to which the reply must be 'then this has concluded the examination, goodbye' (by the way, the only thing private is what happens within the bedroom of married couples, although their have been some who have even perverted this). Parent you have a RIGHT and obligation to search everything your children are exposed to, with as much scrutiny as I have apply to know whether something contains peanuts for my child (who's deathly allergic); Is not their spiritual welfare MORE important than their physical? If only more parents could really believe this.
Proverbs 29:15The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.
I beg you to allow this passage to examine your present practice, does this passage serve as an encouragement or a stern rebuke?


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