Thursday, May 7, 2009

Getting prepared for Marriage?

This one goes out to the eligible, including teens with many years ahead before such a day.
What characteristic chiefly should you then look for in a potential spouse?
Sensitivity to God, which means sensitivity to the word of God, which means visible growth in godliness. Perhaps you were thinking 'someone who really loves me', that should be a given, but it's not the test of a good marriage candidate.
I knew of a pastor's wife who used to say that 'the way I measure how much someone cares about me, is by how much they care about my children'. Any good single mother will first be concerned about whether or not this 'guy' will love her children (unless they're already moving out), in otherwords they will measure his commitment or love by his treatment of what is dear to her heart, namely her child.
In the same way, a Christian should FIRST be concerned about their greatest love, GOD! Likewise they should gauge the commitment level of their potential spouse by his or her commitment to what is closest to they're heart, namely JESUS CHRIST!
Ok, Ok, so what does that have to do with 'getting prepared'? Everything, because it's not so much a matter of finding 'that' person, but more importantly 'being' that person. I believe there is some fruitful truth in the statement 'the best way to find a mate, is to stop looking for one'. Not to discourage men from pursuing a wife, but to bring balance to a obsession that takes the place of daily needs and duties.
There are many single people that have a 'savior' picture of their potential spouse; they put off things and habits that they expect their spouses to do for them once they are married. That's NOT preparing yourself, that's a wrong understanding of biblical marriage and that's an unnecessary and unrealistic burden to place upon your spouse. Jesus Christ is the only Savior, and His Spirit the only sanctifier. Don't wait to 'clean house' until you get married (your 'godly' spouse does it for you). Don't wait to diligently seek the Lord in bible study and prayer until marriage as though the pattern will be 'easier' to start with your spouse.
Marriage is WARFARE, it's a God ordained covenant and a beautiful expression of saving grace. For this reason, resistance will come from within and without: it will come from your own flesh, the devil and the world!
With that said, you must begin training today, don't wait, start preparing now!

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